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I wish the human race were transformed into cute little rodents whose only aim in life was to have continuous, lusty, mindless animal couplings at every opportunity, hundreds of times each day! Women who are visiting often ask "Are there any available Hungarian men? Rex Harrison crooned it best, in My Fair Lady, "Oozing charm from every pore/ He oiled his way across the floor/ Never have I seen a ruder pest/ than that hairy hound from Budapest." Men, however, must take a different approach to attract the wily Magyar leány. " Other communications were made by rubbing anything else.

" Yes, Budapest gets the juices flowing, and why not? Ever since Zsazsa Gabor first uttered "Dahhling..." and Cicciolina first sprayed a front row in Turin, foreign men have felt an irresistable attraction to Hungarian women. They are among God's loveliest critters, scampering merrily around the Danube basin clad in tiny bikinis, clinging halter tops, and those wonderful high heeled shoes known in other parts of the world as "fuck-me pumps." If you are just traveling around Hungary or staying for a while, there are a few things you should know about dating Hungarian women. I have known people who had a perfectly happy, if somewhat shallow, relationship with absolutely no intelligible communication between them for months at a time. Otherwise you will have to speak Hungarian or find a Hungarian who speaks something you understand.

The direct result of this is they never lost their femininity and believe it to be “powerful” to look, act and walk like a real woman. Hungarian women are raised to be excellent and loyal mothers and wives.

Most Hungarians feel it is their duty and actually enjoy taking excellent care of their husbands and children.

They are extremely hard workers and will protect their family at any cost.

] By Dork Zygotian As one walks down the street in Budapest, a common reaction that many visitors have as they gaze at the physical perfection of Hungarians is "Gee! This information is aimed at men, those slaves of testosterone who carry their brains in two neat little bundles between their legs. All Hungarian men are charming, enchanting, good-looking, and completely unintelligible if you don't speak Hungarian.

She recieves daily faxes from suitors the world over and she knows the exact opening hours and addresses of the Chinese restaurants that serve imported lobster Szechuan style, which goes extremely well with a light, yet fruity French white wine, slightly chilled, and remember to tip the waiter 10%. You are different than all the nice smelling young men she's known. Nor has she been busted for possession by the same cop in Alabama, dropped out of the same University, belonged to your voodoo cult, nor ever watched The Brady Bunch. You can't tell a Hungarian girl that you are a tourist. And while the local Joe gets to home after two dates, you will have to wait longer. You will have to compose yourself with a lot more chilvalry and charm than Western girls demand. You compliment her looks, her clothes, ask attentively about her day at work. At the same time, all this hoopla is designed to get you a few old fashioned rewards.